Even though this a Blog about Acupuncture and Health, I believe that we can't have a balanced healthy physical body without also having emotional balance as well. My husband and I have been married nearly 5 years and have read numerous relationship books. He is also a relationship counselor. During our several years of reading and working on our ability to have a co-creating and loving relationship this is the book that we keep on coming back to time and time again. The techniques that Gay and Kathlyn provide in this master piece are simple, elegant and profound.
One of the main points in this book is called the 'Upper Limit'. It is something that most of us, maybe even all of us created. We normally created this at a young age. The 'Upper Limit' refers to our unconscious belief that we can only experience a certain level of happiness. When we start reaching said limit there are behaviours that we put into action to sabotage the happiness we feel and are experiencing. Therefore what happens our happiness experience decreases and we come back down into our sub-conscious comfort zone. The place that we believe we deserve to be. Now probably right now your conscious mind is saying that's stupid, or that can't be true, I wouldn't do that etc. Try for a minute to remember the last time you and your loved one had a argument or you just felt frustrated and maybe ignored the reason, then repressed it to only come up again at another time. After you come up with that experience take a look at whether it came on the heels of a period of intimacy, a success, an enjoyable evening, after you felt seen or heard and so on and so on. Normally if we are truthful with ourselves what we found out is yes there might just be a correlation.
This book goes into detail about our Upper Limit, how to recognise it, what to do about it and how to use it as a sign that we just might need a little alone time. It also goes into co-dependance and how to transform that into co-creation and co-commitment. How to stop blaming to allow both partners to take 100% responsibility for their experience. How to stop arguing nearly immediately and how to end criticism.
It's a comprehensive
multi-part learning experience that reveals everything you need to
know to find, create, and maintain a truly joyful relationship.
I hope for yourself and your loved ones that you consider investing the time and energy into the techniques that they teach. That you create inter-dependance, intimacy and true happiness in your life. All it takes is a few minutes everyday of your time and attention.
Blessings on your journey.
